I need a pen pal because I used to have a roommate that I found on Craigslist, but he moved out after a few weeks. Now I live alone.
I need a pen pal because I used to talk to co-workers, but then they said, “Why don’t you just work from home?” I told them that I didn’t mind the commute, but they keep on telling me it would be better if I worked from home. So I do, but now I don’t have any face-to-face interaction from work. When I call in they ask me to “just say it in an email” so I do.
I need a pen pal because I joined a book club at the local library. But they said that it would be easier to Skype at a certain time, like on Oprah, but whenever I show up they aren’t there. I have never actually Skyped with another person before. I bet it’s fun.
I need a pen pal because I joined Facebook, but no one sent me a friend request or confirmed me as a friend. So I don’t have any friends. At least on MySpace I had Tom. He never wrote back, but at least I could send him a message. And I am sure he read it, but he was just probably too busy to respond.
I need a pen pal because, when I go to the grocery store and I am checking out, the cashier always tells me to go to the self-checkout. But I don’t want to because I want a person to ring me up. But they keep saying, “some people have to use the self-check out, otherwise, the cashier lines get too long.” It just always seems to be me.
I really need a pen pal. I decided the best way to go about finding a pen pal is to go through the phone book, starting with A and xerox copies of my letter, sending it out until I get a response. So it looks like a Ms. Agatha S. Aab gets the first priority at being my pen pal. I hope that she jumps at the opportunity, because I really need a pen pal for some good old fashion communiqué.
by Meg Scanlon